By Ethan Mickelson
For as long as there is life there must also be death, and how the departed are honored can impact how they are remembered by those who live on. As a business built on this cornerstone, Dakota Monument Company works to consecrate the unique personalities behind every headstone.
No matter how each life is remembered after it has come and gone, the family and friends who remain look for comfort in a personalized memorial of their loved ones. As president of the fourth-and-fifth generation company, Dave Anderson does everything from sweep floors to meet with clients, all in an attempt to keep memories alive.
“To me, monuments are a celebration of a person’s life,” said Anderson. “The fact they even existed at all is worth a lot. Looking at the big picture, we all like to remember family and friends regardless of the situation.”
Dakota Monument has been passed down through the Anderson family since they originally opened their doors on Main Avenue in 1911. Taking over for his father, Dave Anderson oversaw the construction of their new facility in 1994, now located off South University.
The tight-knit team is made up of a handful of friendly faces including Anderson’s two sons. With a backbone of family tradition, Dakota Monument has been solidifying the lives of those who have passed in shining granite and marble for over a century. Throughout the years, even something as absolute as death has transformed in how it is honored and dealt with in the area.
Straying from the traditional epitaphs or phrases written in memory of a person including verses from the Bible and proverbs of comfort and peace, there is an increasing personalization that lines headstones throughout cemeteries. According to Anderson, what is included on a memorial is as unique as the personality they memorialize.
“It varies so much on the individual, their family and their story. We see more vivid imagery with parents who have lost their children. They tend to show their activities and put out more pictures of them at different ages growing up. If they liked baseball, motorcycles or soccer, they tend to included more visual meaning to the memorial,” said Anderson.
While some people of an older age question the importance of a memorial, for the family who live on, there is no question of the value.
“You’ll find a number of people who say, ‘I don’t need anything just scatter my ashes into the wind,’ but it’s not so much about what matters to them. It’s about their family and the descendants who want to remember their dad or uncle. If they don’t have that they’ve kind of lost that connection with them,” said Anderson.
Just as important as the visual reputations of photos and text is the material and style of headstones. In orderly lines resembling those of a cemetery, the Dakota Monument showroom is filled with headstones of all shapes and colors. Whether laser etched or hand carved, they all include spaces for each client to add their own personal touch.
“I think they find their desires and work from that,” said Anderson. “Obviously budget has something to do with it, some people will just get a piece of concrete and write the name in it. Then maybe down the road they can afford something to put on top that piece of concrete.”
While there are an increasing number of people who choose to pre-plan their memorials, decisions ranging from color to size are often left to the surviving family members. To help understand what they want to include in the memorial, Anderson starts with a simple conversation.
“I find it easier to just sit down with them in the conference room and talk. If it’s for dad, maybe you aren’t sure what dad liked or wanted so it’s a challenge in that sense. It is more of asking questions and listening to the types of answers you get.”
Though the degree of personalization has gone up, there are still some symbols and messages that are still seen regularly. According to Anderson, the cross and other Biblical messages are still used more often than not. However, the idea of memorializing a lost loved one has shifted considerably.
Take a rock garden that the Dakota Monument created near the lakes area of Minnesota. Within the otherwise un-developable space, a collection of rocks exists that signify the memory of loved ones from across the region. While their bodies aren’t tied directly to the space, the thought of their lives still exist within each stone.
In fact, bringing the memory of loved ones into everyday life has become somewhat of a trend, with Anderson explaining, “We’ve put benches in people’s backyards, by lake cabins, we’ve had them pick up these rocks and we don’t know where they end up. It could be a garden or wherever.”
While the traditionally wooded areas filled with somber colors and rolling hills are still prevalent, some unconventional memorial practices predate most of the traditions developed in America.
“‘In Japan for example, they have these monuments for families and inside the monument itself there’s a stone that is removed and they put the ashes within. They seal it up and the capsule and their name just goes on the stone. So they can have 40 people there or two, it just varies on the size of the family.”
In the U.S., the growth of non-traditional memorials has been on a steady incline. The rate of cremation was just over 43 percent in 2012. This accounted for an almost ten percent growth from just 34 percent five years before, according to the Cremation Association of North America. By 2025, the rate of cremation is expected to rise to nearly 59 percent.
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